Like anyother day

Today is just like anyother day. I miss my love, I want to be with him and the distance still kills me. Yet I endure on and think about the day when we can be together. So many things will happpen that I want to be with him for. Like Valentines day, and then I missed watching the Super Bowl with him...I wish that wasn't this way...but it is. It makes it hard to look at the good in life...but I know that we will figure it out and will be together one day.

Other then that...I might be getting a job soon. Which I am excited for. I will be happy to get back to work and kind of move on with my life. I will never stop thinking about my mom, or stop missing her. But if I don't move on then I will never be truely happy. She would want it. Daddy called today, it made me wish I lived closer so I could help him. But at the same time I don't know if I can go back into the house right now. Who knows when I'll be able to. It's hard to thinking of looking at the house she decorated and walking past her room knowing she's not there...When I went back for the funeral and I walked in the house I called out to her, to let her know I was there like always...It broke my heart to realize she wasn't there...it hurt me so much. It was like a sharp stabbing pain into my heart. I find the need to call her almost every day...it makes it so hard when I feel like now I need her more then I ever did before.

I love my mom...and I love the man in my life who makes the sun still shine for me. I'm sure there is still a light at the end of the tunnle. I'm sure that all will be as it should be...I know that life moves on...it's just a matter of when...and where it goes